MOUSE


This song was written as the soundtrack to a story that Scott and Mike wrote. The story is silly, but the music isn't. Mostly. So for those of you who feel that humour and music don't mix, please stop reading now. Just enjoy the song. As for the rest of you...

Steve Nibbler is a big ol' pathetic loser. His three hobbies are; watching TV, masturbating, and eating cheese. One day he decides to get adventurous and combine two of the three. He can't eat the TV, so he attempts to seduce and have his way with several small pieces of cheese. After a few failed attempts, he eventually manages to score with a particularly attractive little Swiss number. Exhausted, Steve soon falls asleep, leaving the piece of cheese sitting on the floor. Soon afterward, a she-mouse scurries out from the wainscotting and, gleefully spotting tonight's dinner, makes a dash toward the filthy, spent cheese. She reaches the cheese and dives into one of the holes. There she is confronted by a fetid pool of Steve's rancid DNA. She is impregnated. Soon after, Mouseboy is born. Half man, half mouse. Shunned by both mouse and human society, Mouseboy grows up bitter and full of rage. He decides that he must exact revenge upon the sick, twisted mind that brought him into this world.
He must kill Steve Nibbler. Mouseboy pays a visit to The Evil Dr. Colono MD, who designs for him the latest in bio-mechanical weaponry and armour: The Rodentia 5000. Mouseboy dons his new armour and goes on a killing spree of biblical proportions.
The army can't stop him. General Spim is quoted as saying; "Anyone with the audacity to fuck a piece of cheese is certainly a force to be reckoned with. His offspring doubly so." The government calls in Belzon Tert: Interstellar Warrior. Belzon opens up his Meddling Kid Belt Pouch, and sets them and their dog loose. They are no match for Mouseboy. In seconds they are dead, and Belzon Tert slinks off, hoping nobody sees him. Then the Melon People show up with their fearless leader Meloni. They attack mouseboy while playing some bad jazz fusion. But Mouseboy is prepared for them. He reaches into a secret compartment in the Rodentia 500 and pulls out a weapon which The Evil Dr. Colono, MD designed for just such an emergency: The Melonballer. The Melon People flee in terror. Mouseboy continues his killing spree. Finally, Mouseboy arrives at his destination; Steve Nibbler's Mother's basement. He gazes upon Steve, in all his pathetic glory, and decides that killing him would be an act of kindness. He lets Steve live.